i'm sorry for everything.
and i'm
definitely not blaming you for all this stress i have.
its just school work thats getting into me.
and i tend to think a lot,
so it becomes
mental stress after awhile.
bear with me, love.
steal my soul; 4:40 PM
i read your blog.
and
i'm sorry i broke your heart.
i never did tell you anything because i'm
unsure of it myself.
i'm confused,
and i have too many problems to put relationships in mind right now.
lets just be friends.
steal my soul; 5:00 AM
seriously, i have enough stress already.
so stop giving me more.
not everything in life can go right for either one of us.
i know you can't accept the decision i made.
but we can still be good friends.
like we once were.
i'm literally
tired of my life.
and i don't know what to do about you to save our
friendship.
steal my soul; 3:23 PM
i'm at the stage of
breaking down.
breaking down
both emotionally and physically.
i just feel like
crying all the time,
and my legs almost seem as if they'll be like
this forever.
furthermore, the pressure of 2 CAs in 1 day, being in 3/6, and everyone else being so clever, are getting into my head.
im literally
hanging on, trying to do my best to maintain my standard
and fulfil expectations.
however, how long can i withstand
this?
steal my soul; 1:20 AM
baby, i wished time would stop for us just then.
steal my soul; 11:59 PM
to think of it now,
i was rather stupid to let it all slip away.
steal my soul; 1:52 AM
today was...
ahem.being squashed in a car wasnt exactly the nice part of a perfect chinese new year visiting trip.
but i guess it was
fun-ny.
we actually managed to take a group photo despite the
horrid car jerks and cramped spaces.and i swear i wasn't the only one suffering.
cousins were in awkward positions. feet on someone else's. and manicures getting ruined.
kenneth and i exchanged shoes. he had to tip-toe throughout, because my shoes were too small.
so now he knows
the pain of wearing heels.
steal my soul; 11:40 PM
yeah, so we spent yesterday's date
staring at each other, and smiling.it was successful, i guess.
you were really sweet to send me all the way from
bukit batok to punggol.
unfortunately, i couldnt let anyone see how sweet you were.
and seriously, i'm
confused about us.
i seriously dont know if you're what i want.
and i dont want to hurt you.
so i hope my words aint leading you on.
glad you really loved being with me, and enjoyed every moment of it though.
steal my soul; 11:10 PM
valentine's day.the day when lovers should all be out,
enjoying themselves and appreciating their loved one by their side.
and unfortunately, i was stuck in floorball.
i didnt mind
much, because there was no one
special enough to make me groan and whine if i couldnt go out with them.
yeah, so you did ask me out this saturday.
but i'm uncertain.
what if it isn't the way you meant to mean?
what if its all one sided love.
or worse still, whats going to happen through that period of time.
steal my soul; 10:51 PM
haha. why was i even
that bothered then?
yeah, we're cool.
the next time we see you guys,
we'd think of an
evil plan to greet you all.
haha so. today was meaningless.
but i guess chinese new year shopping with kim was fun.
steal my soul; 1:04 AM
oh my.
haha, this is such a coincidence.
mine : http://hallucinations-.blogspot.com
some other girl's : http://hallucination-.blogspot.com
my friend totally mistook it for mine.
and since when did i start talking like that?!
haha thats so... NOT ME.
steal my soul; 12:32 AM
i spoiled
it.
yeah, it came to this.
yet again.
i keep making the same mistakes, just on different people.
its just.
i dont quite love you.
and i feel that you have the right to know.
let it go, love.
because im sorry the
absence of my love is present.
steal my soul; 10:31 PM
school's been really busy.
and i've been having
irregular hours of sleep.
i have to wake up at 5 just to study for tests.
and i
seriously havent got time for problems.
but thankfully,
you're here for me.
steal my soul; 1:03 AM
i cant bear to see you this way.
i know i've hurt you,
but i never thought we'll be like
this.
i hope you'll be able to pick yourself up again.
and face me.
because
i love you hun.
i always did.
i always loved you the way i loved a brother.
steal my soul; 7:32 PM
i've been thinking the past few days.
and i found out that there's no point.
i
used to like you, and i always tried to be there for you.
but now, its all too late.
everything feels different. and probably
is too.
steal my soul; 5:30 PM
i have problems. i always did. and i still do.
i try to solve them, but sometimes,
they just
cant be solved.
i have a few more weeks to make up my mind.
i seriously
cant afford to make a wrong decision.
because it'll affect everyone.
steal my soul; 9:26 PM
why cant someone understand the
pain im going through.
its been really stressful,
and
i can hardly take it anymore.
i try my best to do everything i need to do.
but all your actions are
bringing me down.
everytime i have problems, i'll go to you.
but i always leave the room without an answer.
i end up
breaking down and crying.
but thats not guiding me to an understanding of anything.
steal my soul; 9:04 PM
yesterday was
troubling.
i thought that
was what we wanted.
the attention. whats more, from you all.
we seemed invisible, but
you proved us wrong.
though we didnt do anything that could make anyone look back and think,
i couldnt stop thinking that what we did were crazy.
steal my soul; 5:06 PM
i swear i didnt tell you because
i didnt want to hurt you then.
i intended to, whenever we were both ready.
all sort of tests have been troubling you,
and i didnt want to make it worse.
im still sorry you found out yourself,
and not from me.
steal my soul; 9:45 PM
